The only thing this show makes me want to conceive is a way to kill myself.
Since these episodes had little in the way of service I had to combine them into a single post. Also the show continues to be torment so you aren’t missing much if you dropped it. If it wasn’t for the fact that I hate leaving things unfinished I would had stopped these posts as the service level feels like it is dropping each episode. So at this point I’m just doing this for completion sake and filler till we have other posts ready and not taking this seriously anymore (if you want serious me you have the senran posts). Time to suffer.
Itsuki is watching Collette as the show continues on it’s cringe meter by doing the whole “dur hur she is so innocent and you must corrupt her” thing. Though it’s more along the lines of “this girl has the mental capacity of a 5 year old and you must fuck her” which japan loves thinking about because that is a perfectly normal fetish in japan apparently. Itsuki arrives at Collette’s bakery and helps her with making bread so he can get closer to her. However no one comes to the store which Collette says has been the case ever since her grandfather got sick and she had to take over.
It dawned on me when watching this but her job is to raise someone else’s kids. Why must one of the best looking girls in the show be subjected to such a fate? I didn’t really think about it till now but why is one of the kids brown? There is only one brown girl in the show and he has yet to hold hands with her so why does he have a brown kid? Someone needs to tell him one of those girls was secretly holding hands with someone else. Actually maybe everyone in the show knows and doesn’t want to tell him. Maybe Itsuki is too oblivious to the fact that one of these can’t be his kid but everyone else doesn’t have the heart to tell him. Itsuki has become dale gribble and based on that kid’s skin color I wouldn’t be surprised if john redcorn was the real dad either. Though I wish dale was the main character in this as it would make the show more entertaining.
Eventually some of the others come in to buy bread which Itsuki uses as a way to cheer Collette up as Alfie comes in with all the kids as well to visit him. She lets the kids eat as much bread as they want and then pays for it helping out even more with cheering Collette up by getting more sales.
Eventually Bulk and Skull whom have now been turned into monsters and got tired of pestering the power rangers come by to the store to harass Collette. Apparently they work for a company that sells lunchables and they want this location to open up a new store and want her to sell it. She say’s this is the reason why her store is suffering because everyone is buying them instead of her baked goods. Despite what americanized Brock tells you eating jelly filled donuts that look like rice balls is not a healthy lunch so she shouldn’t be surprised at her inability to beat the competition.
Eventually the kids are able to chase them away by reminding them of the show’s current rating and that their appearance in it will now appear on their resume. This leads to them running out at the realization filming scat gay porn together would be less degrading than being in this show. Itsuki is later told that the company that makes the lunchables is owned by the drill hair girl’s family. I can’t remember her name and who really cares at this point. So Itsuki decides he will go meet with her because he doesn’t believe in capitalism or free market and wants her family to stop being successful and selling their products. Christ he is going to get participation trophy’s introduced to this world next isn’t he?
Itsuki meets with drill hair who refuses to get involved and is opposed to Itsuki’s attempts to bring communism into the world. Remembering what his kids did earlier to Bulk and Skull he reminds her of the show she is currently in and it’s current rating. Overcome with grief drill hair kills herself by smashing her head at the table at high speed much like half the audience that have already died watching this. Itsuki realizes he has his prints all over her arm after trying to steal her silk rich girl glove thing earlier to jerk off with and since phoenix wright isn’t in this world to defend him from the incoming murder charge he takes the body and runs.
Jar jar binks suggests hiding it in a closet and taking care of her after she wakes up since rich girls can’t properly kill themselves and she is still alive. During this time the plan is to get her to fall in love with him due to his caring nature and feed her Collette’s bread in hopes she will gain sympathy for the bakery after tasting it.
After some time has passed which I assume was in reality only a few hours she collapses from not eating the bread believing something is wrong with it. Itsuki panics and takes off his mask showing her that it is him and that he wants her to eat it to get better. Itsuki feeds the bread to her like she is a baby leading to the question of why must japan do this. We have already seen this previously with collette being “innocent” like a child (i.e dumb) and now drill hair needing to be spoon fed like a 2 year old. You’re not making this easier japan with your love of women that act like literal children. This of course causes drill hair to fall in love with him saying he is the only person that cared about her while all the others were only after her family’s money. This leads to her choosing to stay there and be taken care of by him.
After taking care of her some more she eventually tells him she wants to have his child.
And that is it. Seriously. What is even the point of these scenes now? There was no service here whatsoever. These scenes in the games were the core component to service but here they are just skipped altogether. At first when I skimmed through this raw before the subs came out I thought maybe the scene simply cut away and would finish in the next episode. But no that was not the case and this was all there was as the sound of the child popping out happened right after. No skin, no service, nothing. What does this show even want to be? It sure as fuck is not funny if that is what is going for.
Collette’s grandfather while still sick gives her his recipes and a flyer to a festival about to start soon. He tells her this would be the ideal chance to sell a lot and to follow his recipes to prepare for it. Meanwhile the glasses guy is horrified to look through the scripts and realize we are only halfway done this show so far and the episode ends.
Normally at this point I could be relieved but not this time as we still have another episode to go. More suffering.
Jar jar binks is writing a novel before telling Itsuki about the festival that is going to take place later that day. At that moment Itsuki gets a letter delivered to him by another person I can’t remember the name of because this show gives you so little reason to remember or care about names. Regardless he meets the mailman which is a shota that is for some reason the next maiden. I’ll use this time to point out that I can’t stand Yuffie from final fantasy 7 and refuse to accept her as anything other than a prepubescent japanese boy. This also applies to anyone that reminds me of her and so this thing is a shota from now on and will be referred to as such.
Colette tells Itsuki she lost the most important recipe from her grandfather and is trying to remember how to make it so they can use it for her booth at the festival. We also see that the priest woman is bad at blowing as the two boys reconsider their plan to give her the double shota penis in her mouth when she least expected it.
I hate scenes that start with a white flash. How many people will not see that webm now because it blends in.
Oh boy more 100 percent original humor that we have not seen constantly done in ecchi shows. Surprised they didn’t have her accidentally squirt white icing on her face as well to make the generic unoriginal humor complete. At this point this stuff reminds me of that shitty knock a group of people down like bowling pins gimmick that happens in western cartoons so much. Seriously though this gimmick is so overdone that it pisses me off when I see it. How about doing something new for a change? She could had taken that bread and just shoved it up her ass saying she needs to give herself a bread enema to learn her grandfather’s baking techniques and that would be more original than this. Sure it wouldn’t be realistic but neither is the way these woman eat food either. All that fucking spit they put over the food I have seen dogs with better manners. This is supposed to be a vagina or at least a clam that looks like a vagina. I don’t know why they are censoring it though. The people that make this show have never seen a vagina before and considering it’s japan they haven’t seen one in porn either so it’s not like this would look like the real thing in the first place.
Itsuki and Collette keep trying to make the special recipe that is forgotten. Meanwhile the shota visits jar jar binks and asks for help because she can’t deliver the mail fast enough. Back with the others Collette remembers what is needed to make the best recipe and asks Itsuki to help her. On a side note I can’t spell Collette for shit and keep having to go back to correct it every time I type it and pretty sure even then I missed some. From now on I refuse to accept this as a real name. Fucking Tales of Symphonia made up fake name for girls.
After learning how to make corn dogs as that is what I am going to call that because I don’t believe in fancy names for what is just a corn dog they head to the festival. While there they find out that drill hair is mindbroken from the previous episode after she regained her memory and remembered she is in this show and so Mahiru and the girl whom had a decent episode and yet I can’t remember her name because we never see characters again after their episodes tells Itsuki they were asked to sell the lunchables there in her place. As a result they decide to make it a competition.
In the end both of them sell out but in the case of the others they have a large amount of new shipments to come in. Itsuki uses this to point out the difference in Collette’s bread and the lunchables and that hers are hand made and not mass produced. Collette happy at hearing this takes Itsuki to another building so they can hold hands.
That is it. Just like before these scenes give nothing for service.
Having completely sold out of lunchables they are told by drill hair to start selling panties instead and so they set up a booth in which you get to take as many panties as you can fit in a bag.
Itsuki runs into the shota again who gives him a letter. He follows it to an address and is put through a bunch of challenges to see if he has mail delivering skills by the shota’s master. In other words if Jigsaw just decided to become a teacher for the postal service this is the result. After passing Itsuki finds the shota digging in the mud having lost one of it’s letters.
The shota being mentally ill starts crying over not finding the letter and how important letters are. Rather than haul ass and run or beat the shit out of them and take their wallet so they can see there are worse things to lose, Itsuki stays and helps find it.
After finding the letter the shota goes off to deliver them with Itsuki agreeing to help since he now has mail delivering skills thanks to his appearance on ninja warrior mailman edition earlier. When they finish the delivery he is given another letter by the shota asking him to fuck his boy pussy. So they go and remind us that this show has no service at all during the parts that it should.
Collette plays with all the panties she won at the festival thanks to her high level fudge packing skills she developed being a baker which meant she could fit the most amount into that small bag compared to everyone else. And the episode ends as you realize we still have 5 more.
Is there even a need to put thoughts at the end of this? The fact that I wrote this post the way I did pretty much sums up my opinion of it. Everyone knows this show is garbage and not even the good kind where you can laugh at how bad it is like in the case of King’s Game last fall or even Imouto this season with it’s art. There is nothing in this show worth watching it for. The humor is terrible, the story is almost non existent, and the service has at this point completely gone away. I still can’t even figure out who this show is supposed to be for. Fans of the game have already killed themselves at seeing a game they like given such a terrible show while those that have not played the game surely won’t go near it after having seen this.
When all is said and done this is easily going to be on lists of the worst videogame based anime ever made. So if they were going for that then they did something right. Kind of amazing though that in the same season we get senran which is doing things right by not only being interesting but also giving service we also get conception which serves as a prime example of how not to do anime based on a videogame. Next week is going to be the last two girls and then just 4 episodes left after that. Considering they have been skipping battles and such I have no idea what they will be doing for those last few episodes. Chances are the next post will cover two episodes at once as well as doing these weekly just isn’t worth it with how little there is. I didn’t even watch last week’s episode until the day before this week’s due to how unmotivating it is to watch this. 5 more episodes of suffering.
I think I will be doing all the posts for the show like this from now on. No use taking this serious when the show can’t give forth a serious effort. I can say this is without a doubt one of the worst shows I have seen in a long time. If I wasn’t covering this I would just be downloading or better yet just streaming as this doesn’t deserve the hard drive space and quickly skimming through it in like 2 minutes just to see if anything of note happened and then be done with it.